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A Letter from Mark

This past Saturday was the first of a 2-day pirate invasion of the Georgia Renaissance Festival, and I must admit that I had a great time wandering around the old place again. We started the day at the front door where some lady in purple yelled at everybody a long time before letting us all in.  I think she did that as a distraction so we didn’t notice all them boobs everywhere, but man I noticed.  After the lady finished yelling at us they opened the door so we could get in and once Continue Reading

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Captain Drew Announces Wholly Unauthorized Pub Crawl

This weekend pirates will descend upon the Georgia Renaissance Festival for their annual late spring gathering. The traditional meeting point for this assembly is the Pub on the Hilla picturesque pub serving beer, wine, cider, and ale.  This spot is one of several pubs featuring stage acts like Landloch’d and the Beastly Boys. It also features Friar Finegan, a monk who is developing a habit for leading festival-goers on pub crawls.

In an effort to assert his now-legendary pubcrawl-leading credentials, Captain Drew has made “arrangements” to lead a “pub crawl” of his own this Saturday at GARF’s Pirate Invasion. The Captain’s pub crawl will begin at the Pub on the Hill around 12:30pm, it will arrive at the Drunk Monk Pub by 1:15pm (wine and cheese MAY be available upstairs, if renovations are complete), arrive at the Brewer’s Pub by 2pm (musical act TBD by fate), then return back to the Pub on the Hill in time to join in on Continue Reading

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The Compleat Barley Mow

As I was recently polishing off a pint of ale I was reminded of a time many years ago when the minstrel group Wine Woman & Song would regale us with an old favorite, The Barley Mow, during pub sing at the Brewer’s Pub at the Georgia Renaissance Festival. With a bit of time on my hands I decided to find out more about this old tune. For instance: what’s a “barley mow”? What’s a nipperkin? What’s a drayer? What’s a Continue Reading

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GARF Offers Best Ticket Deal of the Season

Yesterday I was directing the workmen who were replacing the figurehead for the front of my ship when I noticed a tiny red flag had popped out of my rPhone so I carefully dialed the number to the orbital telemail waystation to check my inbox and discovered that the ticket drovers down at the Georgia Renaissance Festival had announced the best deal yet on tickets to the Georgia Renaissance Festival. After purchasing a bootful of tickets for myself I decided to Continue Reading

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Georgia Renfest Adds Whiz Rocket Ride (Men Only)

I stumbled across these Sontoran Whiz Rockets at the Georgia Renaissance Festival this past weekend and while I did not see them in operation I did note that there were no warning signs or instructions posted. One little fellow tumbled out of a normal porta-potty and announced that “My junk ain’t tall enough to fit!”. I have yet to try these out and am interested to know if anyone else has experience piloting one of these contraptions. Question: do you need to have 4 passengers before it will go?

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Free Water! Georgia Renfaire Shines Despite Rain (Top 10 List)

I know a lot of lubbers hide in their shacks when the storm clouds push in, but this past weekend at the Georgia Renaissance Festival I observed how the show goes on whether it rains or shines and I’ll count down TEN reasons why you should toss on your galoshes and head down to New Castle.

 

  1. GREAT PARKING
    On rainy days there are fewer cars which means that you get to park a lot closer to the entrance!
  1. CHEAPER THAN A WATER PARK
    The last time I checked (which was 3 minutes ago) a discount day pass ticket to White Water was $39.99 and the water parks don’t sell turkey legges or swords.
  1. SHORTER LINES
    Whether you’re in line for boiled eggs on a stick or the Welsh Shin-Kicking Ride, you won’t have as long to wait
  1. CLEAN RENNIES
    A rare sight indeed if you were to listen to the slanderous Haymarket press that I’ve written in past about rennies. All the same, bring some Himalayan Pink Salt Bar Soap along and see what happens!
  1. WAY COOLER
    By the time May rolls around the temps really begin to climb, but a jolly good rain storm can really chill you to the bone. Bring a bikini shawl along, just in case.

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Parking Options for PiratePalooza

Parking options for the City of Decatur, from lots to decks.

People often say to me, they say, “Captain, could you please climb down off of my table whilst I am eating my dinner,” which is a perfectly reasonable request. Other times they simply ask me for the best parking options when attending my world famous PiratePalooza™ Pubcrawl & Pubsing. Continue Reading

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The 2016 PiratePalooza Press Packet

2016-pubcrawl-press-packet

At Captain Drew’s behest the crew have prepared a special press packet for the 2016 edition of the award winning PiratePalooza™ Pubcrawl & Pubsing, the most popular pirate-themed pubcrawl in the world! Available as a small PDF download from this link: 2016-pubcrawl-press-packet – Share and enjoy!

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2016 Renaissance Festival Forms

2016-05-rennie-forms

After an exciting incident with scones and a wooden chair at the Royal Peacock Tea Room, and in an effort to decrease rail and bannister-related injuries, I recently assumed the position of INSPECTOR with the Bureau of Renaissance Festival Inspections and paid a visit upon the Georgia Renaissance Festival and am pleased to announce that Continue Reading

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Offended Artists Justify Themselves with Petulant Redesign

tshirt-outrage

Dear humans of the United States, just when I believe that I have finally understood what drives your species you go and have a swutting juju-flop of a frandelkrap about some bloody t-shirts that simply encouraged your children to pick themselves up from your nasty, action-figure strewn carpeted floors, launch themselves past your Continue Reading

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