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Nightmare’s Gate 2015

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This past weekend I decided that I needed to relax in anticipation of the upcoming 11th Annual PiratePalooza™ Pubcrawl & Pubsing, so I called around to my friends hoping one of them was foolish enough to answer their phone and reveal their location to me.  In retrospect I rather wish that I stayed on the ship and watched an Alf marathon because I’d have saved myself a rather extensive laundry bill and avoided a shocking case of full-body poison ivy caught from hiding naked in the woods overnight.

At least I can provide a public service to my friends and crew by telling you to STAY AWAY FROM DOUGLASVILLE!!!

Seriously, those people are not messing around out there.  If you are for some reason unable or unwilling to consider this general advice (freely given), you should consider my next nugget of more specific advice regarding Douglasville, namely:  do NOT go near the haunted hall of terror named Nightmare’s Gate!!!!!!! {www.nightmaresgate.com}

Allow me to explain why I say this… Continue Reading

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Curvy, Scurvy, and Purvy at PiratePalooza!

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The first two attempts to interview this singing group did not go as planned, and the third interview was an absolute disaster. The fourth interview was cancelled due to a lack of rum, and the fifth interview resulted in a fire that threatened to engulf half of Brest. The sixth interview attempt should never be mentioned in polite company. Finally, we decided to simply steal an interview with the group that was published by Rolling Schooner magazine in 1733.

When did you get together as a group? How did it happen?

Captain Scurvy Pete misplaced his old crew and was looking for a new crew. He met Curvy and agreed to hire him as his new cabin boy. (He still doesn’t understand his strange attraction to his Continue Reading

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Toucan Dubh at PiratePalooza!

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In 2004 Julia McPeek Campbell & Ian O’Donnell met at the North Georgia Celtic Festival where Ian had been performing solo for a couple of years. Julia was with the Border Collies at the time and the two musicians hit it off immediately and began playing together soon thereafter. Julia’s driving fiddle paired well with Ian’s musicianship & repertoire, and with their voices rounding Continue Reading

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Tenpenny Travelers at PiratePalooza!

Tenpenny Travelers

The Tenpenny Travelers first met around the turn of the century at Live Action Role-Playing (LARP) meets, where they provided live music for dances. By 2005 their group had gone legit and could be found performing at the King’s Gate at the Georgia Renaissance Festival. This brief period as “classy instrumentalists” for the quality would not last long, however, as just two years later they’d be found performing for rum-soaked Continue Reading

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Linen Brocade at PiratePalooza!

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It was a dark and stormy night in 1712… make that 2012… when the band known as Linen Brocade first assembled in response to a plea from their fanboy, Captain Drew, to make an appearance at the PiratePalooza™ Pub Sing… Continue Reading

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My Parents Basement is Full of Nerds

The Bar Area

This evening I met several of my pirate kin to observe the official public opening of a new Avondale experience called “My Parents Basement”, which has been constructed upon the remains of the dear departed James Joyce Pub – a wonderful establishment that I understand to have been eaten by a giant star goat, or some such. This new place, My Parents Basement, is a strange new flavor of crazy that just might work – let me tell you more! Continue Reading

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Raising a Pint to Our First Decade (Let’s Kill DragonCon)

Raising a Pint (or two)

Even though it is a few months past our 10th anniversary I wanted to thank all of my nerd friends for a tremendous decade together. It’s been quite a madcap voyage and I couldn’t have done it without each and every one of you, even if I can’t remember your individual names. I refer to you as a group as “Harvey” and sometimes Continue Reading

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The Wrath of Palooza

Wouldn’t YOU like to know what this is all about? 😉

Secrets! 😉

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Winners of Space Gun Contest Announced

The Magical Boobies Tour

Last week my Internet crew announced the first event in the lead-up to our 10th Annual PiratePalooza™ Pubcrawl & Pubsing, which has come to be regarded as the “Start of Pirate Season” in the southeastern United States. Last night they brought the submissions to my cabin and we reviewed the many wonderful submissions. I would particularly like to thank Hilda McBhiggböttum for her oil painting of “Captain Drew Astride a Mediterranean Concubine” but this has become a family show and so her amazing work (which should have won) will only be able to be seen by those who visit my cabin…. and lay in my hammock… and stare at the ceiling.

As such I’m putting my 2nd choice (which I’m told has become quite terribly popular amongst the crews of many ships) forward as the winner of FIRST PRIZE for this competition… that’s it up top, in case you hadn’t already guessed. In a work of mad genius a Floridian pirate known to his friends as “John The Badger” has assembled a collage (a French word meaning ‘to glue’) from his own photo collection and from that of many others. For his bold act of photo piracy and his obvious grand artistic panache we will all stand back and clap heartily at this creation that celebrates 10 years of wonderful, wonderful boobies and Great Pirate Fun amongst some of the silliest, most smilingest ruffians you might ever hope to meet. GREAT WORK JOHN!!!!! THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY TREASURE CHEST!!!

Julian the Bloodthirsty

Our SECOND PRIZE goes to this photo of young Julian the Bloodthirsty, for having captured the bust of our Number One Enemy: Commodore Stephen Decatur. Such ferocity deserves an upgrade to the latest in space pirate weaponry: the Gloopgirdle Juggernaut XJ-7 Pocket Eliminator (requires batteries). Use it well, you little sea urchin.

4 Pixel Photo

And our THIRD AND FINAL PRIZE goes to a Miss D’Toaster who has submitted a photo of herself at her very first PiratePalooza™ in 2009, from inside our dear departed pub known as The Angel. The remarkable thing about Miss D’Toaster’s entry is that it only has about 4 pixels in it. While I know that there were many submissions that were far more worthy, I was struck by the simplicity of this woman who has the temerity to submit a photograph that was obviously taken using a potato. This intrigues me, and I find that I must award her the final Space Pirate gun on the principle that it might in fact result in some sort of mayhem. Anyone willing to submit a 4-pixel photograph to a 10th Anniversary event must surely be deranged, and I’m all about enabling the deranged with state-of-the-art alien technology. It’s a calling.

Thanks again to all who participated and to Mister Roger Wade Riddle for supplying the AMAZING space pirate guns! We’ll be ringing this Palooza in right and I hope that you’ll join us in the other events we celebrate on the way to our big date in Decatarrrr!!

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Help: Lost Treasure in Siberia

Captain Drew is an Alien

To anyone who was at this year’s PiratePalooza and found a sack full of strange equipment, I would like it back. It contains my medicinal rum, a large block of cheese, a bottle of port wine, a television remote control, and my rPhone™. Unfortunately for me, the rPhone™ is the only thing besides my rPlank™ that will run my “find my treasure” apparatus. So, until I can get a replacement rPhone or remember where I buried that train car full of Nazi gold I’ll have to keep digging by hand with the ship’s laser cannons and hope that I get lucky. So far nobody has noticed us out here blasting away and I hope that it might stay that way until after we’ve found the treasure and made it back off world. (Thanks to Dean Ansley for the photo of me inside the laser hole)

Hope you’re all doing well!

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