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First of all, if you have half a brain you would know that you should never, ever, plan how to win a fight at your local Renaissance Festival. It’s just a bad idea all the way around, Charlie.

Besides all of the obvious reasons for a person to avoid getting into a fight at any Renaissance Festival (broken teeth, forfeiture of Renfest Patron license, court costs), there are other less obvious reasons.

Over the last few years your old pal Captain Drew has noticed a renaissance in Renaissance Festival costuming, particularly in the area of leather pouches. In the Olde Dayes booths featured pouches with leather and bone toggles, or a complex series of rawhide lashes and laces. These looked great but they weren’t always convenient when you were looking to pull out Ye Olde Cellphone, and they were forever loosening up and dumping out Ye Olde Crappe onto Ye Olde Grounde. So it was with great rejoicing that the strange caste known as “Rennies” did embrace the wonderful world of tri-locks and swing latches. While they weren’t period accurate enough for the lore guardians of the SCA, they *did* appeal to the 21st century sensibilities of Ye Olde Rennies. Unfortunately, these handy latches and catches can break if you like to have lassies grind around in your lap as I do. But don’t despair me hearties, fixing these pretties be easier than slipping your cockatiel Continue Reading

It were the night of the Dragon*Con Pirate Party (quite fantastic if you could get in) and The Captain had been called into action far sooner than intended. Still groggy from the previous day’s activities, I thought to splash a bit of me grandfather-scented Old Spice™ round about me person… you know, just to freshen up. Well, as any pirate knows, getting all sashed up and lashed up into your fightin’ kit takes a bit of effort, and somehow in that leather and linen melee I ended up walking into the lobby of the Hilton with me bottle of Old Spice™ in me hand.

Too much of a bother to turn on me heel and go back down to me autocarriage to put away the bottle of aftershave, I elected instead to make it me canteen for the evening and drunkenly offered a sip to an endless number of Continue Reading