23 Jul 2009
Captain Drew Endorses Gooble Voice
Update [Dec 2011] – Captain Drew claims no memory of the following and ordered his Gooble Voice number be removed from the website
BREAKING NEWS – Today Captain Drew announced in a press conference at PiratePalooza’s corporate headquarters that he will be teaming with the internet giant Google in a effort to increase awareness of Google’s newest service “Google Voice” and to spur adoption of Captain Drew’s steam-powered rPhone™. Visitors to PiratePalooza.com will now be able to leave messages for the Captain via a handy Google Voice widget in the site’s sidebar, directly below an advertisement for the Captain’s rPhone™ (as featured in the infamous YouTube video “Dairy Wench”).
In what has been described as “the most confrontational press conference since Steve Jobs threw a camera at an intern” Captain Drew rambled for 35 minutes before relieving himself off the front of the stage into a trendy messenger bag carried by one of the reporters. In a fleeting moment of clarity the Captain explained:
“Well I heard tell that there be this incredible [unintelligible] net thing… and that this here Gooble bunch think that they know how to make money from this net [unintelligible] so I aims to get my [expletive] hands on their Gooble booty before any other deck sprawlers lay wind of it. Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble Gooble…..”
The Captain’s speech went on for another 8 minutes before he curled up underneath the lectern and went to sleep.
A technology reporter from WIRED magazine was heard to say “Dudes… don’t expect Gooble to team with Captain Drew anytime soon on [their next product] ‘Google Wave‘… hey, did somebody spill a drink on my bag??”
…
