8 Jun 2023
The Questionable Coronation of Captain Drew
On April 29th, 2019, Captain Drew (space pirate) announced his candidacy for King of Newcastle against the incumbent King (“2 Door Hank”) Henry VIII. The Captain rushed through a questionable coronation ceremony at the Tavern on the Hill on the very last day of festival.
That ceremony arguably made him the new King of Newcastle at the Georgia Renaissance Festival.
A group dedicated to dethroning “King Captain” Drew has exclusively provided us with footage.
Our editors decided it would be best if footage of this questionable coronation was held until after the Captain’s Official Coronation at PiratePalooza 19.
What do YOU think should happen?
Pirate Insists He is Rightful King
King Drew assured our reporters that he is now the legitimate Monarch of the Realm of Newcastle. He insisted that they are all his devoted and loving servants.
“Their support is going to make things a lot easier when I go up on taxes next year,” he shouted.
“The new video arcade I’m putting on the horse field is going to knock your socks off!!”
Revolution Brewing?
An unidentified minstrel making bunny ears with her fingers responded:
“In the shadow of uncertainty and suspicion, the so-called coronation of Captain Drew as King of Newcastle is a sham. While the pomp and circumstance may have momentarily dazzled a few drunks, it is abundantly clear that this dubious claim holds no legitimacy in the eyes of Newcastle’s true denizens. The absence of widespread support for Captain Drew’s reign underscores the inherent flaw in his grand charade.
In a kingdom forged through history and tradition, the coronation orchestrated by that pot-bellied, self-proclaimed monarch appears nothing more than a self-serving power grab. The people of Newcastle, united by their skepticism and disillusionment, stand resolute in their refusal to acknowledge his questionable rule.
Time will surely reveal the true nature of this farce, and as the days pass, Captain Drew’s reign of uncertainty will crumble, leaving behind only the enduring spirit of a kingdom that never truly bowed to his insincere claim to the throne.
THE REVOLUTION IS NIGH!“
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